scrooge behavior
I am struggling. I don’t like holidays. Unless Thanksgiving is considered a holiday. I like that one. But all the other ones… we can probably do without those. Let’s start with Halloween, since that is the one that is currently encroaching upon my life and choking me with its absurdness.
I don’t know how it happened but I started dating this guy a while back and he is not like me at all. I would say our primary difference can be encapsulated in the way each of us would handle the following situation:
Problem: You’re walking through the grocery store and see someone you know. Let’s say you don’t know them. Let’s say you saw each other once when you were five years old and you have a vague recollection of maybe seeing them once. And you could be mistaken.
Solution as per Steve: “Hey! It’s a guy I know!” Steve is usually happy to see anybody he recognizes as having seen before ever in his life, and will talk to them for many long times no matter what.
Solution as per Brittany: “Oh man. It’s someone I know.” Maybe I should leave. Maybe I don’t need to get groceries right now. Maybe they didn’t see me. Maybe I’ll hide. (I usually hide.)
So I am getting better as far as the sickness goes but I’m thinking this weekend will give me a little kick towards the sick side again. Steve, as Weber County MVP, knows everyone and everyone knows him. He came to be the Weber County MVP by being such a chipper, easy to get along with fella. Everyone loves him. That’s cool. That really is cool. I just wish he wouldn’t get invited to so many Halloween parties.
I haven’t been to a Halloween party in ages. I haven’t dressed up for Halloween since I was in elementary school. My Halloween plans over the last several years have included sitting in my pajamas watching a totally anti-Halloween movie, eating pizza with the lights off. The lights off, obviously, is an attempt to thwart trick-or-treaters from coming to my house. I usually rent a threatening-looking Rottweiler to sit on my front porch with a sign around its neck that reads: “I bite children. For no reason.”
But alas, plans change and I am apparently going to a Halloween party. TWO Halloween parties. For Steve’s friends. I hang with the awkward crowd who doesn’t have Halloween parties, I suppose. Not only that, but I am dressing up, and I am bringing a famously good seven layer bean dip to the event. Not only that, but the ingredients to compile said dip required an extra trip to the grocery store. Not only THAT, but we saw someone Steve knew at the grocery store and I had to make awkward conversation in front of the apple juice.
I’m waiting to feel better about this holiday but it’s not happening.
You and I are so alike. That is why we don’t date. The only reason.
In that situation, I would become very occupied looking at whatever foodstuffs were by me even if I hated said foodstuffs. If they said hi to me I would stop looking at the foodstuffs and act like I was in a huge hurry to finish my shopping…in the opposite direction.
mayhemkm
10/30/2009 at 2:08 pm
Yup, I kept staring at the Kerns Guava Nectar. I couldn’t take my eyes off it. It was weird.
mostlyprobably
10/30/2009 at 2:12 pm
I’ve moved back to my home town and vaguely recognize people all the time and feel embarrassed (after SEVEN 1/2 YEARS…Why am I embarrassed?!) to not remember their names, so I pretend like I don’t recognize them even though I can feel them looking at me trying to figure out who I am…
beck-ah!
10/30/2009 at 2:20 pm
Ha ha ha, nobody understands you like one of your own kin…me. I completely understand. I think it is great that Steve is such a friendly fella. He and Ty can be friendly together and you and I will sit in the dark together trying not to be noticed by anyone we have ever met. I HATE seeing people I know.
Meghan
10/30/2009 at 2:21 pm
I may have once hid behind a wheelchair accessible van at Walmart to avoid eye contact with an ex-boyfriend at one point. I may have even faked a phonecall when, on another occasion, said ex and his pregnant wife started walking towards me with smiles on their faces in a grocery store. Another time, I may or may not have bought 2 pounds of sweet cream butter and expensive guacamole (THAT I DIDN’T NEED) as I grabbed things on my rushed way to the register when the SAME ex was spotted coming up behind me in the dairy aisle. I am socially crippled. I like guacamole, though. Have fun at your parties!
Amanda
10/30/2009 at 2:34 pm
I am so with you on this. And hello! Josh would love to go to the grocery store and see somebody he knows. He like, loves mankind or something. I totally don’t get it. He also forces me to go to parties, interact with other persons, and dress up. I feel your pain.
Courtney
10/30/2009 at 3:14 pm
I would say I’m sorry but I’m not. I’m ok with everyone knowing me but am even more ok with how different we are. The parties I could care less about but I do have friends that I want to show you off to. I have never been in the situation where I can say to my friends “Hey man/woman! Have you met the love of my life! She’s right here… was right here. Where did she… ahh there ducking behind the potatoe display. Her name is brittany and I love her and plan on marrying her in the future. She’s the best woman on the planet!” So you must please understand that I do it to show off the fact that a hottie loves me. I hope you are able to endure many more to come. I love you babers!
papa bear
10/30/2009 at 3:55 pm
Why am I surprised you don’t like Halloween? It seems so…Brittany to me for some reason. You are so full of life and Halloween just seems like a perfect time to let that out. Hmm. I’m okay that you don’t like it though, it is a rather weird holiday. Is PB from a small town or did he grow up in Ogden? Wanting to talk to everyone you know/thinking someone looks familiar and want to make a connection seem small-townish to me. I am one of those weirdos who likes to make random connections like that in the grocery store! It is weird, I know. At any rate, I hope you have a fantastically fun time dodging people tomorrow! And, I hope you start feeling better! And, I promise this comment is now over.
Heidi
10/30/2009 at 4:37 pm
The dip sounds famous and delicious. At least that’s an upside to the whole holiday. I have to agree with you on Halloween. If it wern’t for the cute costumes my kids wear, and the bag of candy they will innevitabley share with us, I would reject the entire holiday.
Michael
10/30/2009 at 5:24 pm
I LOVE Halloween…probably even more than Christmas! But it may be because my kids worship it and I love to dress them up and eat their candy.
I also hate seeing people I know. We are Asays.
Natalie
10/30/2009 at 5:57 pm
I think this trait of not wanting to see people must come from Dad because I like seeing people . I don’t think any of you are as antisocial as you say. You always seem pretty friendly to me.GET WITH THE PROGRAM!
I love you and by the way it is a commandment to love everyone or have you forgotten? Steve keep up the good work—-I’m with you on this! Love MOM
Mom
10/31/2009 at 11:42 am
Mom, I most certainly will keep the good work up. I’m super glad to not be alone in this wide open world of ours.
Papa Bear
10/31/2009 at 12:51 pm
I got your back PB Shannon had the same problem with me it might just be our friends
Billy
10/31/2009 at 5:05 pm
First off, I don’t think Natalie is much of an Asay anymore. Halloween sucks, but I can understand Steve wanting to show you off. Thanksgiving is definitely a holiday, It’s the most economical and besides I usually get two days off for it. I’d say it’s probably my favorite. Halloween…I get nothing.
When I see people I know I generally glare at them and pretend I hate them. They usually think twice about starting up a conversation with me in front of the apple juice display.
Brett
11/01/2009 at 8:00 pm
Oh, Steve- that was sweet. Also, you must have awesome friends if they actually have a potato display at a Halloween party. I heart potatoes.
Amanda
11/03/2009 at 7:37 pm